-| Wanting |- 

People don’t change - unless they want to.

Humans are unique in their ability to willingly change. We can change our attitude, our appearance and our skillset.

But only when we want to.

The hard part, then, isn’t the changing it.

It’s the wanting it.

-| Priorities |-


It’s comforting to use someone else’s priorities to guide our work. It lets us off the hook.

But the only way to do our best work is to realize that part of what it means to do our work is to own the priorities as well.

My boat, my compass. 

My Priorities. 

-| Connection economy |- 


The connection economy is built on ecosystems, and they depend on partnerships.
1. Don't change the rules.
2. If you have to change the rules, tell your partners in advance.
3. And even if you can't do #2, at least tell them the new rules.

Trust is precious and easily wasted, and guessing is a lousy foundation for future progress.

-| Words that matter |- 


Discipline, rigor, patience, self-control, dignity, respect, knowledge, curiosity, wisdom, ethics, honor, empathy, resilience, honesty, long-term, possibility, bravery, kindness and awareness.

All of these are real skills, soft skills, learnable skills.

But if they’re skills, that means that they are decisions. A choice we get to make. Even if it’s not easy or satisfying in the short term.

These skills are in short supply sometimes, which makes them even more valuable.

-| Rainbow |-

Late July. Onset of rains.

The blackest cloud I have ever seen squatted over Ooty and then it hailed pebbles for half an hour. Nothing like a good rainshower to clear the sky. Even as I type, I see a rainbow forming! 

-| Only Connect |-

With sudden unexpected showers in Melbourne, I decided to wait it out by ducking in a bookstore. I was engrossed in watching the world pass by when I read the line of two words 'Only Connect - EM Forster' 

As in life, so in art - only connect. The heart of the matter is often uncomplicated. Nor do we need so many words to get to it or share it. My theory of sketching and design is that the conception should be as clear as possible and that details should flow as a clear stream of water. You will of course encounter boulders but you will learn to go over them, around them so as not to impede the flow. If your stream gets too muddy or sluggish, it is better to put aside that piece of sketch / detail. Go to the source, go to the spring where the water is purest, your thoughts as clear as the mountain air; where there is no struggle. 

-| People |-

Quarreled with N and later felt foolish and made up. When will I learn that life is not a novel? Life does not have an organization of the novel. People are not characters in a play, they refuse to conform to the boundaries of the plot or our desires or our needs. 

We have to accept people as they are if we want to live with them or have them in our lives. We cant really change people. Only a chameleon can change a colour as per his environment, and that too only to deceive. 

-| Chance to do it better | - 

You are doing it wrong. 

But at least you're doing it.

Once you're doing it, you have a chance to do it better.


Waiting for perfect means not starting.

-| search the ladder|-

 While it might be fun (or appear expedient, or brave, or heroic) to try to scale a cliff with no tools, it turns out that ladders are a more effective way to level up.

When it’s time to drive a nail, a hammer is a lot more useful than a rock. Even if you have to invest in obtaining one.

Often, we spend most of our time throwing ourselves at the wall instead of investing the time to find a useful ladder instead.

Perhaps, instead of restating our audacious goals, we can spend more time finding useful tools–insights, skills, trust, attention, access–instead.

It’s worth the search.

-| Ditch the bravado |- 

If you are stuck between a rock and a hard place or hanging off a cliff, what would you do? Scream for help or pretend you don’t need it with a dash of bravado?

The answer seems obvious. Our reaction, as well, would be obvious.

Why, then, do we bother with the bravado in our normal lives? We are often between a rock and a hard place at work, in our relationships, with our finances etc. Why, then, do we not scream for help and get help?

Ditch the bravado. Ask for help. Learn. Move on. It’s okay to be in a bad place.

Once again, it’s okay..

- | what we want |- 

The same thing everyone else is having, but different.

A menu where the prices aren’t all the same.

More attention than the person sitting next to them.

A slightly lower price than anyone else.

A new model, just moments before anyone else, but only if everyone else is really going to like it.

A seat at a sold out movie.

Access to the best customer service person in the shop, preferably the owner.

Being treated better, but not too much better.

Being noticed, but not too noticed.

Being right.

-| change and yoghurt |- 

Our family is from a part of India where plain yoghurt is a key part of the diet. Yoghurt is a great counter to the heat and, thus, a staple. So, I grew up a big yoghurt fan and that continues to this day.

As a result, I “make” yoghurt 2-3 times a week. I put make in quotes because it makes itself. But, there’s still a lightweight process involved. And, that requires me to heat the milk till it almost boils over, allow it to cool down a bit, pour a bit of existing yoghurt, and leave it to do its thing over the next day or so.

This process turns out to be very instructive in driving change in ourselves –

1. It helps to face the heat and be under a bit of pressure that pushes us to recognize the importance of change (too much heat causes other spillover effects).
2. Next, we must give ourselves a bit of time to partially recover from the period of intensity and use that time to reflect on the kind of change we’d like to drive.
3. Then, it helps to find a role model for that change – either a person who embodies the behavior or a book or a course that teaches us the way – and spend mental time with that role model.
4. Finally, give it time.

Lots to learn from yoghurt! 

- | Start over |- 

Sometimes it is more helpful to start all over again..

rather than try to work back and see whats wrong..

my big learning in a design project..

-| Watches and time |- 

In the last five centuries, we’ve improved the accuracy of our watches and filled our homes and lives with them.

Of course, the irony is that we now have plenty of great watches and very little time.

Wishing you less timekeeping and more time this weekend..

-| Observation and Evaluation |- 

“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.”
-  J Krishnamurthi.

Our natural instincts tend to have us overdo evaluation and under-do observation. They also push us to conflate both by attempting to do both at the same time.

There’s a time to observe and a time to evaluate. And, learning to keep observation and evaluation separate in our thinking and communication is a superpower because it enables us to have consistently productive and constructive conversations.

Next step for myself: Learn how to better separate the two. :-)

-| understanding is hard-work |- 


Sometimes, we're so eager to have an opinion that we skip the step of working to understand. Why is it the way it is? Why do they believe what they believe?

We skip reading the whole thing, because it's easier to jump to what we assume the writer meant.

We skip engaging with customers and stakeholders because it's quicker to assert we know what they want.

We skip doing the math, examining the footnotes, recreating the experiment, because it might not turn out the way we need it to.

We better hurry, because the firstest, loudest, angriest opinion might sway the crowd.

And of course, it's so much easier now, because we all own our own media companies.

-| Peaceful Soul |-

I want a peaceful soul.

But there is a God. Holy, to the hilt. And we have very little in common on that ground. And there is a part of me that cannot do anything but war against this God. I do not say this lightly. But truthfully.

When I am not arguing with Him I want peace with Him. That fathoms-deep peace defying understanding. I want the peace he has already declared as a reality. But only sometimes.

I want to put down my weapons that defend. And offend. I want that. So my soul can taste something of this peace. But I’m bloodthirsty.

I’ve been reading about Mahaprabhuji. He talks of this peace and I got excited, though scared. He fell in love with the peace in the hills and forests. But that is geography.

But I hear nothing of places of peace. The soul at peace with God retains it though the walls cannot. Though they fall around and upon, still. But scarred stands.

This peace is strong in a world of hard hearts. The pushing against the organ with it’s blood pumping is painful. A world’s worth in my chest. But it chisels away.

This peace is fixed under the feather of the peacock. And is the the dew sitting light on the leaves. But to nourish hard ground.

-| Random thoughts today |-


1. I am lucky to stand clear a star-studded night. 

2. I need a few days off work, so if someone sick could come over and hug me and let me drink after them, I’d appreciate it.

3. Social media now feels like an awful job.

4. Work that cradles your conscience is a valuable thing.

5. Food is my comfort food.

6. Everything is never enough.

7. Sometimes a curse word seems appropriate because it feels as though a curse has landed square upon you.

8. I wish I could still taste the air of a 13 yr old summer night.

9. It has always been a gracious fact that the depth of my sins are not all seen at once.

-| Second Step |-


The first step is learning how to do it. Finding and obtaining the insight and the tools and the techniques you need. Understanding how it works.

But step two is easily overlooked. Step two is turning it into a habit. Committing to the practice. Showing up and doing it again and again until you're good at it, and until it's part of who you are and what you do.

Most education, most technology purchases, most doctor visits, most textbooks are about the first step. What a shame that we don't invest just a little more to turn the work into a habit.

-| Change ... |-

is a word for a journey with stress.

You get the journey and you get the stress. At the end, you're a different person. But both elements are part of the deal.

There are plenty of journeys that are stress-free. They take you where you expect, with little in the way of surprise or disappointment. You can call that a commute or even a familiar TV show in reruns.

And there's plenty of stress that's journey-free. What a waste!

We can grow beyond that, achieve more than that and contribute along the way. But to do so, we might need to welcome the stress and the journey too.